Pondering duology

poised, powerful and confident. Where did that woman go?

Still thinking on this and it’s not that she went anywhere its just that she has gained feelings and a heart, she’s become a little softer on the shell. The more I try to find the answer. Looking back. I had to become pretty hard inside and out to become this person. I hardened my heart. I Trusted no one. I Loved no one for a long time including myself because it was all beat down so I even had to learn to love myself, and I did. And that was where the powerful, confidence came from.

And now, I spread the love but I also open my heart and I become vulnerable. I open not just my heart but my emotions, I am not the heard emotionless person I was. I have allowed myself to feel. And sometimes I wish I was the emotionless, hard person, that was easier. But, at the end of the day, loving is much more rewarding if I am being honest, even if it causes tears or hurt sometimes.

Take today, it’s mothers day. Not technically (legally a stepmom) only a dog mom.. Nike did her part.. my mom and very few closest friends all told me happy mothers day for part of Nike and Naomi.. but those else who mattered that would .are me feel the part not so much, I guess when I am meant to be the part and that time comes it will be. It’s me being sensitive.

I am anxious for tomorrow’s Dr appointment have been all day and sure that is part, getting over stress of mom coming through her surgery (which did go well and she Is recovering) and just being me. Oh, and being a dog mom to a dog who is being a baby at the moment after she slightly hurt herself yesterday, she’ll be fine, but I’m a fur baby mom. Haha

Author: Dana Gidner-Kristal

perfectly imperfect

Spill your brains...

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